Thursday, May 1, 2014

dear april...

my dearest april.

you have kept me hustling this month!  and a little hustle is good for me.  we added 10 feet to our home during the first week which is where all the hustle has come from.  three chicks & one precious, over-the-moon in love puppy has brought new life and reminds me of spring and the new beginnings it offers.

we live on 2 1/2 acres which i just love because it's plenty of land but so very close to the market & freeway.  lots of neighbors have horse, which i am almost deathly afraid especially when we are on the same side of the fence.  i have always wanted chickens...i think because my granny always had them and she would take my sister & me by the hand into the henhouse to harvest all those eggs her girls had laid.  pjm forbid chickens...he said they would bring coyotes who would then eat calvin, the jack russell he despised.  unfortunately, cantankerous calvin, had to be put to sleep at the start of the year, so i did what any grieving "my husband has dementia & my dog is dead" woman would do. i purchased chicks! we have three-with four more on the way!  and they grow faster than a crowd of high schoolers watching a few fellow classmates pummel one another.  they won't lay eggs for another few months, but this farmgirl is excited to follow in her granny's footsteps.  scoot built them an amazing coop the week before he started his job!

as me & the boys were leaving the feed store, we found a flier for puppies, and are now in the throws of house training him!  you can meet rex by clicking here!  he continues to melt my heart especially because he is an amazing sleeper at night!

and all of this new life is refreshing as we watch pjm wither away.  he is literally disappearing before our very eyes. that can happen with dementia-the brain forgets how to process calories so in spite of his hearty appetite & ability to eat, his weight continues to drop.  and it is sad & frightening but seems he is moving closer to heaven. and that is where the blessing will be found, knowing he is slowly making that trek toward resting with God.

and the very last night of the month was filled with bitter-sweet as i walked the halls of sweet brown eyes' school with him so jovial at my side.  pointing left & right, full of fifth-grade pride as he showed me all there is to see at my last elementary school open house. scoot was in fifth grade at that very same school when we were blessed with him.  hard to believe he is off to middle school.  one of us is over the moon excited about what a new school will bring. the other is comfortable in the safety net we have in elementary school. can you guess who's excited and who isn't so much?

pjm was an avid motorcycle rider-dirt, bullet, harley-he loved them all.  and we own a few but it gets tricky because he doesn't have a license to ride them anymore.  i have never had a license to ride them. and i can't insure them because i don't have the proper license.  just take my word, registering them & owning them is all a complicated mess.  we received a notice from the state that they were going to come and confiscate my home-children-pup-chickens if i did not pay the fees on one of the bikes.  i take myself into AAA with my inch high file of forms i have completed numerous times. the kind lady says the hitch in the paperwork pile is i filed that one bike "non-use" not "non-operational".  i must file is both ways for the dmv.  funny because when i look up "use" in the thesaurus right there four words down is says "operate" but according to the dmv, those are two very different things…both of which cost me money.

dear state of ca,
i just paid you income taxes-both for last year and an estimate for this year on the 14th.
it seems like i am paying you to create more work & confusion.
that's beyond annoying.
non-liker of pointless paperwork

dear kind AAA employee,
yes, those were tears in my eyes today.
no it wasn't the fee.  it was the reminder of the status of my life.
thanks for shredding that 3/4 inch of unnecessary documents.
loyal customer

dear God,
thanks for busy feet scratching the ground & running a muck in the yard.
content farmgirl

the chicks the day they arrived just days old.

the girls a month later!


  1. Love your blog! I really relate to this one because, my youngest (of four) and last child is graduating from high school on the 23rd, next fall will be a whole new chapter in my life being an empty nester….having Belle, has been a nice distraction for me as Rex has been for you. I have been busy packing my home as we have decided to move to our ranch. Changing of the seasons is always a little bittersweet, but with that usually comes something more sweet than bitter, it's not always apparent, but it's there. Happy to hear that your cute Rex is such a sound sleeper!

    1. I can't imagine an empty nest quite yet, thankfully! Our youngest will have 7 more years of school so I can slowly drift toward the empty nesting…but by then the others will hopefully have grandchildren for me to love & keep me busy. And bittersweet is so true and I think in the middle of a transition it is my natural tendency to want to cling to the familiar instead of reaching toward the new. Squeeze Belle for Rex & me!