Tuesday, February 5, 2013

my neighbors-the comparisons...

have you met my neighbors?  the comparisons?  the mom.  she is beautiful & bakes & can mix a cocktail perfectly paired with the subtle flavors of the gourmet dinner she prepares for her family...nightly.  her hair is always coiffed, her bangs are never too long-highlights never grown out & a blemish has never found its home on her face.  mr. comparison drives a black sedan and pulls out of the drive, headed to his career, just after 8:30 am with his workout gear in the backseat.  he will "gym" it up on his lunch hour prior to meeting clients.  the comparison children...they are athletic protegees on club sports teams, attend the finest private school & hold leadership positions for the associated student body, all while maintaining a 4.0 in their advanced placement classes.  as a family, they attend church three of four weekends a month & serve their community in numerous charitable events.  did i mention chops-the dog they rescued from the local humane society?  he's just a mutt but since caeser milan has whispered to him a few times, he fetches a ball & doggie toys-never children's toys.  when the wrought iron gates at their front drive swing open, he sits-stays-knows his grass is greener within his yard, fleeing that yard for a joy run around the neighborhood would never cross his doggie mind.

we all live near the comparisons or perhaps they sit next to our child at school or cheer along side us on the soccer field or zumba it up next to us at the gym or walk their obedient dog the opposite way on our street while our heathen pups are strangling themselves with their leashes. your comparisons might look or sound different than mine but truth be told, when we begin looking at others' outsides & compare them to our insides, we will always fall short.  the surface appearance tells only a piece of their story while our hearts-worries-insecurities tell our entire story.  perhaps mrs. c doesn't need to go to the gym because she doesn't eating & mr. c demands there be a cocktail waiting for him when he arrives home from his career because his own comparisons leaving him feeling hollow.  the little cs work frantically on the field & at school, hoping mr. c will notice them but his cocktail has not only dulled his hollow pain, but the joy that surrounds him.  and chops digs holes on the backside of their house that aren't seen from the curb & has been known to poop on mrs. c's cream shag carpet

in all of the brokenness of pjm, i have slowly learned to stop trying to weigh my circumstance with those of others.  if i do not stop myself, pity & sorrow will swallow my very soul.  no, this is not the life i signed up for, but truly whose is?  In 2 Corinthians 10:12, the apostle Paul warns me it is unwise to compare myself to others.  instead, i must first take inventory of all i have been blessed with {my 26 years of an amazing marriage-my three godly children-my friends who cry & laugh along side me-my dog that can walk on a leash & doesn't chew my favorite slippers} and then i must say thanks to God for providing for me so generously.  and second, as i sit in the front row of God's classroom of my life, i must eagerly raise my hand and ask Him what he so desperately is wanting me to learn from these circumstances.  i don't want to be caught staring out the classroom window at the comparisons and miss His lessons for my life.

good morning God.
thank you for your more than generous provisions for my life.
i am sorry i overlook the blessings & focus on just the broken.
i want my trust-faith-love for You to grow.
these circumstances have forced me to find-depend-trust in you like never before.
i must remember, i am in your hands & you will not let me fall.
student of my life

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