Tuesday, February 22, 2011

mixed blessings...

december 31, 2009

i had just finished telling the kids how excited i was that a new year was just a few hours away. never before did i need a fresh start, but than the phone rang.

at the other end was my stepdad.
my mom was in icu. she had a heart attack.
she passed away peacefully on jan. 2nd.

another year plagued by sorrow...
but God is one of grace-joy-gratitude.
how is God good always...in death?

as the year unfolded and each day was more challenging and uncertain then the day before without a mom to
encourage-love-guide me thru a season that was
already so uncertain?

but God is good..always.
in may i see my dr. for my annual physical and burst into tears.
i tell her about my mom's death
my husband being diagnosed (misdiagnosed) with alzheimer's.
she listens...truly listens...
the first dr. in a year to hear my pain and want to make a difference.
to "practice" medicine and not just diagnose within her familiar box.

after a plethora of tests...
and collecting more bodily fluids than i would like to remember-his not mine-
we get a tests results back that unravel a mystery we have been living.

lyme's disease...in the death of my mom...a miracle.
God is good...always.
death...followed by renewed hope.

i miss my mom...but her death provided me-peter-our family with a miracle.


  1. Oh my dearest Mama Bird...

    How proud GrammyCracker would be of you in all of these trials yet you remain so strong and faithful! She is up in heaven proud of the amazing woman she was so lucky to raise... And I get to be proud standing down here right next to you! (I'm more lucky than her because I got to learn from you growing up!)

    I love you. You're the bomb.

    P.S. The right alignment is great. I love it! Perfect touch!

  2. i hope she is proud...some days i fail miserable at a multitude of things! but you bubs and j are my rocks during the season and of course our amazing GOD!

    i am learning to blog and do it with a bit (very little bit) of flair...not like you however!

  3. You tell your story with such grace my friend. Loving getting to "click on" to see what God is is revealing to you...and then to us!

    Hugs~Love~Blessings to you